Speak Now

IMG_3247 - 2008-07-29 at 02-13-24

 “Reality leaves a lot to the imagination.” ~ John Lennon

“It’s the stupid questions that have some of the most surprising and interesting answers. Most people never think to ask the stupid questions.” ~ Cory Doctorow

Chasing rainbows at 4 AM is like chasing rainbows in general. I just want to make that clear upfront. I really wanted the fruitless task to be variable in relation to the time of day. Turns out it’s not. The proverbial guy who won’t give you the time of day might as well be chasing rainbows, for all that’s worth. Shun the shunner, that’s what I say. They will never see the irony in that.

I’ve been awake since 1:30 AM. It is now 4 AM, and I have about run through most of my habitual fears enough times to allow me to move on, even if only for a while. That puts me here in front of the computer. I did hear a brief coyote pronouncement a while ago, which was a comfort because I have not heard from any of them critters in quite some time. Yet I also heard some guy, somewhere up on the little ridge behind the apartment, prattling on in Spanish. There’s a barking dog over in a different direction. The sounds of the night come to my tired ears.

I have to admit I was watching a Taylor Swift DVD last night, her “Speak Now” world tour recording in front of a Chicago audience. This young woman is the real thing. I used to call her my guilty pleasure, but the time has come for me to openly express my admiration for her talents. At the beginning of the DVD she speaks of how if you have something to say, or to show, do it now; speak now and I’m like dude I’m already doing that! Yet it is good to be reminded, especially on a sweet morning such as this, when my efforts at writing are slightly stilted and rudderless. Yes, Taylor Swift’s sincerity pushed my button.

“It’s supposed to be automatic, but actually you have to push this button. ” ~ John Brunner, Stand on Zanzibar

Tomorrow is my day off from work. There is that therapy session I’ve been writing about recently. Considering that we’re going to be going into the PTSD from my bicycle accident back in ’84 I am actually and admittedly more than a tad apprehensive, but that is likely a very good thing because the something bad that can happen already happened thirty years ago. Let’s call it reverse-apprehension and get on with it. I’d really enjoy feeling better. My past method of dealing with the PTSD has been to be flippant, and to peruse the research and statistics relating to the disorder. The research is extensive. I get a lot of milage out of that distraction.

I can’t seem to get going with this blog post so I will call it a morning.

Peace out, y’all. Goof gloriously.

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2 thoughts on “Speak Now

  1. I keep pushing’ buttons and getting different voice streams, all of them seeming to let the air out of past-lives’ trauma n’ drama. I love watching your writing – cause I have the sense you’re doing some of the same – which must mean we doin’ the opposite of shunnin’ each other. 🙂

  2. Yes’m we are. In general I see’s it all but I am really quite shaken up by facing some professionally facilitated rattling. Thank you for being here for me. This is fun but it is scary.

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