“Out of clutter, find simplicity.” ~ Albert Einstein
Okay. If Uncle Albert is correct I have ample opportunity to find simplicity. Actually I am doing pretty good in that respect. This new phase of my life is a limbo phase, a phase between chapters of life. The financial crunch that hit me recently, and is still hitting me, makes it easier to sit still, to assess my situation, and to find solace in simplicity. I’m doing pretty good at it, if I do say so myself. There is one shining beacon down the tracks aways, although it is not a certainty in any way, the shine is what counts. Like the totem animal Raven I am drawn to shiny things. Whatever keeps ya goin’, right? The clouds are hanging low this morning. It’s kind of a cozy feeling. Intimate, before sunrise, soft morning before an edgy day. Going into town is always edgy for me. But that’s where the work is so that’s where I go. After 23 years in the Keys this Town of Taos still feels like a city to me, and I’ve had 20 years to get used to this feeling. Seems it will stay. No problem.
A gentle rain is falling and the coffee is here, hot, and satisfying. I’m looking for simple. Just looking. I find myself in a reflective headspace, so far today. Reflection does not harm my work performance in any way. And it is a workday. This one will put me in the cattery, where the adoptable cats are. The other workspace is the intake/isolation area. Some of the cats there are, although healthy, arewaiting for medical clearance before they can be transferred to the cattery, which I refer to, when speaking directly to the cats, as the ‘big house’. The other cats there are dealing with health issues. Working in the cattery is my favorite, but in recent weeks I spend little time there. No problem, all the cats need love and attention. It’s just that from the cattery I can send cats to their forever homes. It’s an exquisite feeling to play a part in sending them home. There is one woman who adopted two brothers, adolescent tabby American short-hair boys, the hands down funniest cats I have seen in the cattery. When they were toddler cats I could just glance over at their cage and the looks on their little faces would crack me right up! Friggin goofballs. Cats have this uncanny knack for looking at you just at the right moment. Anyway, the woman ‘friended’ me on Facebook, and she posts photos of the boys on occasion. It gives me a feeling of deep satisfaction to see their happiness in their new, comfy home. Quentin and Thicke. That’s the boys. Huzzah.
Second cup of coffee. Lucky me. Yes, I am lucky. In this rough passage in life I am indeed, as the Light Chasers recommend, looking forward, and in doing so I am reminded that time is at times recursive, it curls back on itself. In my experience, to view time as linear is daft. Time is also, says me, fractal in nature, and resonantly spunky when novelty is at hand; take deja vu, for example. Mark Twain said, “History doesn’t repeat itself, but it does rhyme”. Reckon this is likely what I mean by recursive time. We move forward yet we, in our naivety, probably don’t consider that some of the effects we created through creative acts, positive or negative, follow us or precede us. When they catch up with us it ain’t nuthin’ new happenin’; we’ve been there before, and deja vu ain’t likely an appropriate explanation for those moments. Time flows, time is plastic. If we consider the timeline of our lives to be Euclidean we miss out on all the fun, and even those non-Euclidean lines don’t tell the whole story. The concepts I am conveying here are the mind-stuff I dealt with in the first few years after my NDE. In seeking meaning behind what happened during that supposedly woo woo experience I had to do something! I never put it all together back then, and I still haven’t, but the work of the late great Terence McKenna provided me with a way of at least articulating what I had learned back during those foggy days, weeks, months, and years. I found McKenna’s stuff back in the mid-’90s, when the proprietor of Merlin’s Garden turned me onto him. Merlin’s Garden was a little metaphysical bookshop on Bent Street, in Taos, New Mexico. Ravens loved the little garden in the front of that store. As big as hawks, those ravens would simply step out of your way as you moved along the walkway, on your way in or out of the store, instead of flying away. It was a timeless place, that book shoppe and its garden. I purchased two used copies of McKenna’s books and read the first one on the train, headed east to visit my best friend yonder in Massachusetts. That book took me back to that time after the NDE. Back then I had referred to God as “the Great What If”, a term drawn from the spooky world of quantum physics. I saw God as a being who was in essence pure potentiality. Life events would unfold from His bag of tricks. Maybe this is what Mark Twain was referring to when he said that history rhymes. Even God has habits.
Clouds shroud the high summits of the mountains to the east, making the sunrise peek around the aggregated moisture up yonder. I’m flying high, as you may have noticed. I reckon that it is because I am again, here and now, seeking meaning through a rough passage in my life. Poverty and temporarily sub-adequate wages are mostly inconsequential when it comes to my soul, yet they are quite consequential when it comes to my destiny, fate, whatever. Life is sweet. That’s what I’m sayin’. Unceasingly rattled by anxiety, subject to the roller coaster bipolar path I must walk, I am still flying when I get the chance. Before me is a skeevy Nerf wall that bounces me back when I try to move forward. This too shall pass. I pass the Nerf nature of the wall off as an effect from the brain damage I acquired from the freak accident that triggered my NDE. My brain is like “huh?” just talking about it. Nothing negative about that. Tools at hand, good buddy. Work with what ya got, not what ya want, or think ya want. One of my tools when openly coping with life, to hone my coping skills, is intellect. Turns out ya don’t gotta use it in the accustomed manner to have it be of use. The rational contains the irrational – yin yang and all that happy stuff. Hey I just had a deja vu as I typed “irrational”. Seems my brain is working just fine this morning. And, seems it’s not the first time.
Peace out, y’all. Goof gloriously.