Lightning in a Bottle

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“Why do you want to shut out of your life any uneasiness, any misery, any depression, since after all you don’t know what work these conditions are doing inside you? Why do you want to persecute yourself with the question of where all this is coming from and where it is going? Since you know, after all, that you are in the midst of transitions and you wished for nothing so much as to change. If there is anything unhealthy in your reactions, just bear in mind that sickness is the means by which an organism frees itself from what is alien; so one must simply help it to be sick, to have its whole sickness and to break out with it, since that is the way it gets better.”  ~  Rainer Maria Rilke

Short and sweet this morning. A rainbow at sunset yesterday, so it looks like the odds for a Summer full of rainbows are looking up. I’ve seen plenty of Summers such as that during the 21 years I’ve lived here, and I’ve been hoping for one this year. Don’t cross your fingers and wait, wink and sigh and watch what Nature puts out for us to see and feel. Oh! Wait just one darned minute now; we are, part and parcel, an integral part of Nature. We can’t change that. You cannot buy a rainbow, nor can you put lightning in a bottle. I’m feel down today. Feels clinical, so I’ve decided to let it ride this time. Been fighting it for weeks now and it is now time to relax and let it flow for now. Probably  there will be considerable chair time for me. Will I write, get back to the fledgling novel I’ve begun? I have no friggin idea. I’ve got to take this body and mind, flushed with clinical anxiety, and harness the whole of my being to go perform a day’s work selling nuts and bolts to productive people. For some strange reason I equate this day’s task with healing. My odds are on the chair.

Peace out, y’all. Goof gloriously.

 

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