Today I Am the River

Little Rio Grande 042.jpg

“The key is the ability, whether innate or conditioned, to find the other side of the rote, the picayune, the meaningless, the repetitive, the pointlessly complex. To be, in a word, unborable … If you are immune to boredom, there is literally nothing you cannot accomplish.”  ~  David Foster Wallace

A writerly challenge confronts me as I start, begin, whatever, this post. Do I say “there is or there’s”? I’ll choose “there is”. There is something profound about a river when seen as a metaphor. All philosophy and/or spirituality aside, the bottom line is you cannot stop a river. You can dam it up all you want but it will still find a way around. Today I am the river. Groggy boy here find’s the morning to be anything but drab. Outside the door it is quiet. Coyotes reveled earlier but now it is quiet. No barking dogs, no nothing. I’m finding it hard to maintain a focus, or even to create one in the first place. Today must be a day of rest. Please? A big day yesterday. Sigh. But I’ll take it like a big boy, I will. Therapy at noon, then a jaunt into town afterwards. I will look forward to coming back home. There is something on my mind and I need it to stay there. I just used “mind” in the last sentence as if my mind is something I’m not. Modern interpretations suggest that the mind can be transcended, but I find that this is not the case, which may mean that my chances at transcendence are slim to none. Yeh, whatever. I did something yesterday that shocked the living daylights outta me, and the living daylights shall from here on out run free. Says me. The details of what I did shall remain unspoken here, but I am feeling okay to say that what I did is something that most peeps would likely do without much thinking about it. Trust me, I thought a lot. Maybe that is why I am tired today, reckon? I can live with that. I feel alive today. I am alive every day, but I don’t always feel it. Sometimes the weight of life overrides the simple fact of life. Cherish the precious moments, k? I had me one of those yesterday. I am not the type to fill up every last friggin second of my day with busyness. How did we as a people ever come to deem busyness to be a virtue? Listen, it ain’t, and you can’t make it so just by acting like it is a virtue. It ain’t. Whatever. There’s a good chance that in honor of the people at Standing Rock, who were just ousted by the cops, in order to make way for the big ol’ fancy oil pipeline, I will watch the movie “Thunderheart” this afternoon. It is one of the few movies I can watch over and over again. My own heart feels/gives thunder today. It got cracked open yesterday. This is a good thing. Our lives can get all dammed up by circumstances; understandably so. But if the need becomes too great, circumstances gotta be all busted up and stuff. You can’t stop the river. Says the inscrutable writer this morning. Today I am the river. Yesterday, everything changed. Today is different, and I can’t say why. I just know that it’s a pretty nice day. Almost sunrise so I’m gonna dust off the camera and go get a gander at the sky show. I’ve not taken many fresh photos in a while. What’s up with that?!

Peace out, y’all.


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