This Spectrum of Shadows


“Careful preparation is necessary before people can perceive something which is there all the time.” ~ Idries Shah

“Pain is a good cleanser of the mind and therefore of the sight. Matters which seem to mean the world, in health, are found to be of no import when pain is hard upon you.” ~ Richard Llewellyn

“A single day is enough to make us a little larger or, another time, a little smaller.”  ~ Paul Klee

It all started with intense pain. That’s my day so far. Well, that and some good reading online. I’ve said it before – perhaps one of the few good things to come out of the Trump presidency is that it has inspired a lot of great writing and journalistic presentation of some obviously fine research and investigation. But about the pain. It was my shoulders and upper arms. I was lying flat on my back, a rare sleeping position for me. The cursing began when I tried to move to sit up. “Dammit, that hurts!!!“. I gave it a few tries, and about two dozen more outbursts of loud cursing, then managed to shift body weight just so to make it possible to diminish the pain enough to roll over on my right shoulder, enough to allow me to sit up in bed. Spinal stuff, no doubt. The pain was about a half hour in fading away. I’ve got a massage scheduled for Thursday. That healing touch. I’m hoping to let some tears out while she works on my shoulders and upper back. That whole area is not just damaged, it also holds a lot of muscle memory, PTSD stuff. The massage therapist and I know each other well enough that I truly don’t mind if she sees me cry. Somehow or other the pain has to come out, if any kind of healing is to unfold. Wah, poor me, right? Yeh, let’s move on. The dark morning sky is seemingly overcast. No stars to be seen. Temperature right around 50º. Comfy. And the good news is that it is going to rain. Or so they say. There’s a lot of weather pessimists around these days. The drought is set in pretty good, and it seems that some people have lost hope. I know the feeling. My former psychiatrist, the pretty doctor lady, once told me that two of the key elements, symptoms, whatever, in bipolar disorder are feelings of both hopelessness and powerlessness. Boy howdy she nailed that one. So will it rain today, and tomorrow, and the next day? Ebert says two thumbs up. Nature makes no mistakes. Ever. Not even the platypus. Now that critter was truly novel creation. But, it will rain. Says me. And rain is cleansing. Soothing. Refreshing. And it might just maybe moisten the ground enough that the moisture doesn’t all burn up, by way of the sun and the wind, come sunset. I remain hopeful, even though I feel depressed today. Go figure. But for now, the faux-rooster is doing that dim crowing she does, as the sky lightens from the passing of Earth’s penumbral shadow. I love to think of things on that scale, to visualize the Earth and Moon and Sun, all dancing together to produce this spectrums of shadows. I think it its helpful to first view on a grand scale, then scale it down to something more personal. Yeh, I’m using the celestial arrangement as an analogy, piggybacked on a metaphor. I like to do stuff like that as well. You just never know with stuff that big. But you can pick at it some. There is always Light hidden in the shadows. Ya jest gotta have a gander and see what you can come up with.

Peace out, y’all. Goof gloriously.


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