The Tao of Apathy

Theater of Clouds -New Trailer 055 (1) Opening.jpg

My artist’s conception of but a small length in the NDE tunnel. However celestial that trip was for me, it was significantly more about terror. I still get trepidation to this day, when I think about it. Just looking at this doctored photo makes me want to run.

“Well, I know now. I know a little more how much a simple thing like a snowfall can mean to a person”  ~  Sylvia Plath

“It was snowing. It was always snowing at Christmas. December, in my memory, is white as Lapland, though there were no reindeers. But there were cats.”   ~  Dylan Thomas, A Child’s Christmas in Wales

“The hollowness was in his arms and the world was snowing.”  ~  William Goldman, The Princess Bride

Snow. Sweet powder swirling in some truly prodigious winds. I slept through four hours of it in the afternoon. That was also sweet. Up for a coupla hours then back to sleep. The wind and snow continued to swirl; perhaps 4-5 inches, though some of those snow banks are considerably deeper. Sun is out, looks okay. I read that the Taos County schools are closed due to there being not enough snow plows to go around, and not enough of a crew to work what trucks they do have. I guess they got lazy after last winter, when snow was but a dream.

Just back from a trip out to the car for a smoke, and strategic removal of snow, to facilitate the Sun’s melting of the stuff. When I got back in it was a quick phone call to a friend, and then I got sucked in to more MSNBC videos. I just feel mundane today. It is kinda refreshing for a change. I guess what may have triggered the mood was reading an article on how to relate to folks with TBI. Put simply, they got smacked upside the head in a critical way. I had a TBI back in ’84. One of the side effects the writer noted is one that I was not aware of as connected to TBI: apathy. Boy howdy does that ever explain a lot! Reading that was a slow-blooming revelation, not an ‘aha’ moment. And it will continue to reshape my inner landscape and I’m like all dude how cool is that dude?! Now that I know that a sizable portion of the apathy is clinical I can be more careful with my not caring. Careful, mindful, whatever. Today is a down day, the kind of day when I drop any anxious resistance to the Tao. Or any other kind of resistance as well, come to think of it. The term down day I learned from my masseuse. It stuck. I owe her for that one. Now . . . I’m a jest a gonna post this-y here blog post then git me back to the Tao, which, of course, I never done left in the first place, right?

Peace out, y’all. Goof gloriously.

One thought on “The Tao of Apathy

  1. Fascinating read! I love reading about (but have sympathy for) all the clinical side effects of falling off your bike and coming back to life. LIke when you say you are an empath. I had to look that up. Then today “apathy” is apparently another side effect you have. So an apethetic empath? That kind of blows my mind. I admit to being easily confused by the bi-polar, TBI and PTSD references and what goes with what, but you explain things so well. Good luck with it all, man.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s