Aging in a State of Play

“Our direct experience is necessarily subjective, necessarily relative to our own position or place in the midst of things, to our particular desires, tastes, and concerns. The everyday world in which we hunger and make love is hardly the mathematically determined “object” toward which the sciences direct themselves. Despite all the mechanical artifacts that now surround us, the world in which we find ourselves before we set out to calculate and measure it is not an inert or mechanical object but a living field, an open and dynamic landscape subject to its own moods and metamorphoses.” ~ David Abram

“How monotonous our speaking becomes when we speak only to ourselves! And how insulting to the other beings – to foraging black bears and twisted old cypresses – that no longer sense us talking to them, but only about them, as though they were not present in our world…Small wonder that rivers and forests no longer compel our focus or our fierce devotion. For we talk about such entities only behind their backs, as though they were not participant in our lives. Yet if we no longer call out to the moon slipping between the clouds, or whisper to the spider setting the silken struts of her web, well, then the numerous powers of this world will no longer address us – and if they still try, we will not likely hear them.” ~ David Abram

Starting the day with a good adrenaline rush is not something I had hoped for, but Nature delivers, and she delivered to me a skunk. That danged animal is still around. When she came to slip under the deck out front I began to hurry back inside, but I stopped in the doorway and peeked around the corner. She was still standing there, tail straight up, watching me. I surprised myself by stepping back out, highly cautious and ready to slip back inside if needed. She backed down and made a hasty retreat, so I went back out to finish my cigarette, watching as her tail merged into the weeds at the far end of the yard. Wow. This heart got a good physical rush. Then, all of a sudden she came running back. Before I could even think about it she hustled under the deck and I was in the clear. If only these animals were homely! They’d be much easier to bear. But enough of that. Yesterday was the first day when I felt the full Summer effect of annoying heat; not a big deal in the grand scheme of things, but I felt somehow inconvenienced by the heat. The barefoot island hippie boy in me has simply had enough high heat for at least two lifetimes. And sunlight. Could we have at least two cloudy days in one week? Is that too much to ask? Whatever. It’s all good. It is what it is. Que sera sera. “It is what it is” sounds like complacency to me. Just sayin’. There’s not really much else to report this morning. Another workday. Ob la di ob la da. I still feel tired today, but without the dire feelings about Trump-world politics. The only practical thing on my mind is that I need to call and get my Medicare registered and ready to kick in come October; sign up for an HMO as well. And all of this must be done under the shadow of denial. Why denial? Well, I’m turning 65 in a few months and how friggin weird is that?! This aging stuff is unrepentant. That much is for sure. I promise I will learn to play with the process. Play is an essential part of life, and if ya ain’t doin’ it on a regular basis ya ain’t doing yourself any favors. So, I am going to play in the shower for a few minutes. The retail world awaits.

Peace out, y’all. Goof gloriously.

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